Correct Parenting is one of the biggest challenges in today’s fast paced world. It does not matter if you are an experienced parent or a new one or a prospective one, one has to go through all the trials and tribunals to turn out to be the best parents for their kids.
I thought to put this concern under my radar when I came across one of my friends who recently got to experience parenthood and the wariness they have makes me doubt the self-assurance levels of modern parents.
Things around us have drastically evolved from the time we were kids. Our parents had different ways to raise us. But in this era, the competition among kids and parents is proliferating. And to raise our kids to face the world, we must pull up our socks.
Today, parents are presented with a sea of advice and information on their parenting ways. This information or advice can come from the people in the habitat or from the search on the internet.
The opinions and suggestions are endless. And in this situation, some of the parents doubt their ways of parenting and child upbringing. Parenting is peer pressure that can even turn into guilt. Before this pressure turns into guilt, parents must closely examine if they really deserve to drown in this unknown rabbit hole. To know if you are not into this category, you need to ask the following questions to yourself.
Are you questioning every parenting decision of yours?
If you are at this side, then you need to stop right now. Frequently questioning every small or big decision of yours will only make your parenting complex. Confusion is normal but repeating questioning is not normal.
This way you as parents are underestimating your powers. Furthermore, it is a matter of trust. If you are doing this, it implies that you are not trusting yourself. This feeling can have an adverse effect on your self-esteem, your parenting as well as on your child.
They learn from their elders’ behavior. Stop doubting your ways and cheer yourself a bit and take the bar high to rate your parenting ways. You definitely deserve a pat on your shoulder for your persistent efforts.
Do you get anxious often?
The fear of under performing makes parents very anxious. Also, juggling the priorities, responsibilities, and duties while raising a child can instigate anxiousness. Anxious parents over pamper their children keeping them unaware of the real life struggles. Their true potential and problem solving skills do not get a chance to develop and these habits can adversely affect a child’s ability to face real life challenges. If you are one of those parents you need to rethink and reanalyze your ways of child development.
Do you sense guilt here?
Working parents are the ones who are most affected by this question. The guilt feeling is always lingering in them. Fathers feel bad when they are working hard to achieve a milestone and this limits them from spending quality time with their kids.
While working moms are always in this guilt trap that they are not doing sufficient for their child. This is the case with non-working moms as well. They will get the same feeling that they are lacking at some point and are not very good when it comes to raising kids.
Successful parents do not let this guilt sniff in their parenting ways. They focus more on what they have achieved instead of thinking about what they haven’t. They are not overwhelmed by such feelings and stay satisfied in their situations. Accepting how things are is the way to embrace parenthood.
It is true that parenting is not easy and it indeed is one of the most difficult things. But there is no such thing as ideal parents or perfect parents. You must understand that being attentive and committed does the task well. There is no correct way to raise a child.
Everyone makes mistakes and it is absolutely natural. Burdening yourself with guilt will just derail everything. Be honest with yourself. Persistent efforts and improving mistakes will make you a better parent, the one your child would wish.